-|*SaNCtUaRY*|-

School Life (2)

Ever since i enrolled into this school, i’ve changed a lot. In what sense? My behavior, perhaps? Haha, the girl who used to be very quiet in school, has had " morphed " to a much sociable person. I remember, back in secondary school, i dont usually talk. Seldom heard my voice in class.

Now, in Nafa, haha, people probably cant wait for me to shut my mouth. Haha..

Well, i like my classmates, i’m saying this not because of i have a couple of them in my friends’ list, but, is the truth alright ?! haha, small but close. (^.^) Unlike the class i used to be in, disorganised, but, they are all straight-forward people, thats what i like about them. I prefer a rather honest kind of class, tells you what they think of you, instead of at the back.

Prejudgemental caused communication break-down. Clarification ensures no misunderstandings. Do not wait till when you’re old, then realise you’ve misunderstood that person. Dont wait for that person to come to you. Dont assume. It might not be that way.

I guess having such a tight schedule, also a good thing.. Haha.. At least, it doesn’t make me think that much. Still, it doesnt stop me from beating myself emotionally. I feel horrible ~ thinking i’m still unworthy… to be in this family. I still cant shake off those criticisms. I love my family, i love my brother, and i’m proud to have him as my brother.. (*sob sob). Why must people always put us on a balance? comparing .. Why? It’s not fair. We are born to have different capabilities. Each of us are unique. Why? Why they have to put me on a balance with someone else and compare what we’ve been through? So what if the answer is, " you are more unfortunate than her? " Does it make us feel any better? Sigh.. It is so hard to bring this idea across to the older generation… Sigh.. Well, i’m trying not to take it personally. Still, it hurts.

i guess, maybe because i’ve always lend my ears to those in need, listen to their problems and provide them with solutions, make me differ from those in my age. Haha.. I still remember, i did this test.. A mental age test. It says my… mental age was 26.

Er.. ahahaha.. i keep on going off the subject.. ahahaha.. it’s s’pose to be about school.. ahahahha..

Ok, i’ll try to be constant next time.. haha

Cheers !!!

School Life Rulz ?

Since that day 5th of June’06, my life has changed drastically. I always take my " carefree " schoolife for granted. Always say " Why so many assignments?! " Actually it wasn’t a lot. Now that i’ve enrolled into this school, i then realise.. what is SO many assignments and projects.

I used to love teachers giving us projects back then. Now come to think of it, i was rather foolish. I thought i could show my capabilities through my project and it is something of my OWN, something which i can proudly announce it’s MINE. I set high expectations in whatever i do, especially projects. But, ever since i’ve came here, things changed. When i try to commit my principles for completing my project, i just couldnt do it. Having so many assignments at hand, i hardly can catch my breath. The only free time i ever have is on weekends. Still, my time is given to relaxation and completing of assignments. When the dateline of the project submission is drawing near.. i have to put my assignments aside and do my project. This is really tiring. Relaxation is necessary as it balances your lifestyle. Overworking your mind is unhealthy. Haha.

Well, coping is really tough, but i’m trying my very best to adjust. If i dont get " used to it " now, during the assessment period it’ll be a lot harder to cope, let alone when i’m at my 2nd year.

14 weeks - 14 lessons per lecturer. Which means you only see your lecturer 14 times !!!!

Well. therefore, they started to bombard you with mountains and mountains of assignments. >.<

Sigh.. >.<

STRESS man ~ >.<

Alright, i’ll continue again next time. In my next entry, i shall include more about my school life like, friendship, etc

Thank you for reading. See ya ~

Cheers !!!

Howdy!!!

it’s time for a short break - Psychology knowledge….

Why psychology? Hmm… well, i’m trying to promote understanding to oneself and others.

It fascinates me a lot, that our mind contains sooooo much of thoughts.

I’ve started reading quite some time ago, like 1 - 2 years back..

Well, i finally thought of writing it here.. sharing with all of you.. and helping myself to remember.. because, i’m having problems remembering.. =P

Well.. Here goes :

Qn1. What is Transactional Analysis?                                                                     

Ans:

- It is a way of analyzing how people deal with each other and how they can change their   lives by correcting their behavioral mistakes.

- It focuses on what goes on inside of people instead of between them.

- It shows people how to act differently with each other in social transactions, rather than helping them to understand why  they were emotionally disturbed.

Qn2. How to know a person?

Ans:

- By watching the interactions of his or her ego states.

Qn3. What are the ego states?

Ans:

-Normal personality ego states comprises 3 parts: The child, the Parent and the Adult.

- the child : creative and emotional part of the self.

- the parent : composed of a set of attitudes about people and life that function in us as if they were prerecorded tapes.

- the adult: a rational " human computer " .

Now let’s cover about strokes.

Qn4. what is ’strokes’ ?

Ans:

- It can be physical or verbal and are defined as the basic unit of human recognition. (i.e saying i love you or praises. Hugs)

- especially informative.

- positive strokes is a show of affection.

- negative strokes ( frankly, i don’t promote this..) [i.e beating, scolding.]

Well, I believe I covered enough.

Not enough?

Well, look out for more next time then.

See ya.

I was thinking about what has been revolving around my life.

I thought about my family…

The quarrels. The giggles and hugs. The tears and hardships we’ve been through together as a family.

Every quarrels, aches and tires me a lot. Especially those hurtful words each and every one of us spoke. The violence. The rashness. Has been flasing in my head whenever i’m alone. It hurts a lot. Whenever these images flashes, my head aches. So does, my heart.

I have no idea i’m the cause of every single tragedy.

I have no idea that i’m the cause of my mum giving up hope on her religion - buddhism.

To me, religion is not just an importance, an identity , and your beliefs, but also the source of your confidence.

Without religion, what are you? i can’t say myself as a religious person. At least, i know its importance in our lives, and its values.

(sigh) . When i looked at huge work loads - school work, and the loads of rubbish in my room (lolx), headache… headache…

My parents will ask , " Mei ah, when will you start tidy up your room??? "

LolX.

Academic. Should I drop design and technology or literature???

I scored horribly for literature, but that’s my passion lies.

I passed design and technology, but i hate that exhausting and stressful process.

So, can anyone tell me what to do?

P.S: please post your views regarding this issue before the end of june.